eddylangley.net - Humour - Male/Female

Male/Female

Subject: She/He Definitions

She/He Definitions
>
>    Wants & needs (wontz and nedz) n.
>            female:    The delicate balance of emotional, physical and
>                       psychological longing one seeks to have fulfilled
>                       in a relationship.
>            male:      Food, sex and beer.
>
>    Thingy (thing-ee) n.
>            female:    Any part under a car's hood.
>            male:      The strapfastener on a woman's bra.
>
>    Lesbian (lez-bi-an) n.
>            female:    A woman who makes love to other women.
>            male:      A woman who has sex with other women so men can
>                       watch and get really turned on.
>
>    Glass ceiling (glas see-ling) n.
>            female:    The invisible barrier that stops women from rising
>                       to the upper levels in business.
>            male:      What would really be great at work since that hot
>                       babe took over the office one flight up.
>
>    Vulnerable (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
>            female:    Fully opening up one's self emotionally to
>                       another.
>            male:      Playing ball without a cup.
>
>    Communication (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
>            female:    The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with
>                       one's  partner.
>            male:      Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off
>                       for a weekend with the guys.
>
>    Butt (but) n.
>            female:    The body part that every item of clothing
>                       manufactured makes "look bigger."
>            male:      The organ of mooning.
>
>    Commitment (ko-mit-ment) n.
>            female:    A desire to get married and raise a family.
>            male:      Not trying to pick up other women while out with
>                       one's  girlfriend.
>
>    Entertainment (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
>            female:    A good movie, concert, play or book.
>            male:      Anything with one ball, two folds, or three
>                       stooges.
>
>    Flatulence (flach-u-lens) n.
>            female:    An embarrassing by  product of digestion.
>            male:      An endless source of entertainment,
>                       self-expression and male bonding.
>
>    Making love (may-king luv) n.
>            female:    The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can
>                       achieve.
>            male:      What men have to call "boinking" to get women to
>                       boink.
>
>    Remote control (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
>            female:    A device for changing from one TV channel to
>                       another.
>            male:      A device for scanning through all 75 channels
>                       every 2 1/2 minutes.
>
>    Taste (tayst) v.
>            female:    Something you do frequently to whatever you're
>                       cooking, to make sure it's good.
>            male:      Something you must do to anything you think has
>                       gone bad, prior to tossing it out.

Subject: Men/Women

Subject: Proof that girls are evil